Amber Skye Forbes

Writing Words With the Tips of My Toes

The Dancing Writer–Episode 2: Asexuality and Gender Identity

There is a lot of rambling in this. I didn’t have this show as planned out as I thought I did (I did have an outline), but I found myself talking and then going off on tangents trying to get in all of my thoughts. Sexual orientation and gender identity is such a loaded thing, but all my thoughts are out there!

So, yes, here is episode two. I update a little bit on my life, then go right into talking about my asexuality. I also talk about gender identity, mostly how it doesn’t make sense to me, so, for now, I’m identifying as genderqueer. Agender makes sense for me, especially because I think I mention a million times how gender in general just doesn’t make sense, but then there are parts of me that say, ‘Hm…maybe you’re a little fluid.’ And I can’t make sense of any of it. Maybe you guys will. I don’t know, but I promise all of this rambling has a point somewhere.

In the video I say I don’t have a direction for my next podcast, but I actually do because I mentioned it in the first one! So episode 3 (or 4, depending on whether or not I can get the video done first), will be talking about the uniqueness of my witches in When Stars Die, just because that’s a loaded topic in itself.

Also, I didn’t actually listen all the way through this. I figure I’d just keep it as it is, but my personal assistant claims there’s a thumping sound about halfway through, which might be the mic or me bumping my knee against my desk (I get restless real easily). But I’ll try to avoid that next time.

If you haven’t listened to episode one, you can find it here.  I would love it if you subscribed if you’re interested in hearing more of what I have to say and eventually watching my silly videos on silly writerly things.

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One comment on “The Dancing Writer–Episode 2: Asexuality and Gender Identity

  1. eric keys
    July 3, 2014

    If you get lost in SC, look for my friend and fellow writer, Winter. And if you find yourself at the end of a dead end gravel road with tree cover so thick you think you’ve gotten lost in the mountains of Papua New Guine, just shout “Eric! Don’t shoot! It’s Amber!” and I’ll put down my shot gun and give you a cup of coffee.

    (Just kidding about the shotgun. I have never owned a firearm. I just like the idea of being the crazy old coot out in the woods threatening people with his shotgun.)

    Anyway, I’m proud that you are willing to come out as asexual. Personally, my sexuality has morphed and changed so much over the years that I’ve given up trying to identify myself at all. (To myself at least.) Right now, I’m pretty solidly hetero, I suppose, but I much prefer cultivating my fantasy life than enjoying actual sex.

    I’m wondering how your fiance is going to react to this. Of course, you can make a relationship work even if there is a mismatch of desire, etc, but for a lot of folks, finding out that the person they are planning to settle down with is not terribly interested in sex might be a big burden. For a lot of guys – and I assume for women, too – part of the thrill of a relationship is knowing that you incite desire in your mate. Not that it’s the be-all-and-end-all of a relationship, but it can be a hard thing for some people.

    Anyway, I do hope this doesn’t become a barrier between you two.

    I agree with you about labels, though. They are a sort of double-edged sword. They can help you understand things and fit them into your understanding of reality but they can also limit you and fuel preconceptions.

    Very interesting podcast. I’ll try and go back and listen to episode one!

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