Writerly Insecurities Never Fade

Writerly Insecurities Never Fade

Licensed for CC use

Many writers dream for years about the elusive book contract. They think, ‘If I had a book contract, everything would be so much better. I could breathe easy because I’d have a contract, an assurance of publication.’ But it doesn’t work that way at all, especially when you realize the work doesn’t end when your book is bound and put in digital stores or bookstores.

The insecurities have just begun.

I knew I wouldn’t be able to breathe easy, even with a contract. It’s still a dream come true, and I’m still so super happy. But now I know my book needs to sell well, and I don’t want it to sell well just for the money. I want it to sell well because I poured every part of myself into this book, and by gosh darn it I am going to strive to make sure a lot of people read it. My new dream is to now become a bestseller, someone known for writing emotional stories with inspiring characters. I will keep writing to achieve that dream, and I will keep writing after.

Yet I have my insecurities. No matter how much pre-sale marketing I do, there is still a chance my book may not sell well. The market is so fickle, so unpredictable. For example, my job is a marketing trainee. Currently we’re giving away a Fiat 500. We use these giveaways to lure in potential homeowners who may be interested in our products. I try to set appointments with them, and if they demo, I get six dollars. If they sell, I get .5% (which is a good amount considering the price of our products). Some days I can get 5 appointments because people are just really interested in signing up for the Fiat. Some days I make 0 because people have such a nasty attitude toward this tiny car. Not even constant persistence can change a 0 to a 1. See how fickle the market can be?

I know the best way to sell your book is to make sure it’s the best darn book possible, but even with that, there is still a chance it may not sell well, and this does scare me to a certain degree. I want to sell well. I want my book to be remembered. I don’t want it to disappear into oblivion in the digitalverse. I also know the best thing I can do is to keep writing, but then there are some writers who have book after book published and they still can’t crack below a 500,000 Amazon ranking. I don’t want to be that. Not by a long shot.

So just because you have that contract and your book is on its way to being published doesn’t mean you can relax. You have to get that book selling and you have to keep writing. I also sometimes think, “What if this is the only book I can do right? What if all my other books fail? I don’t want to be a one-hit wonder.” Even so, I press beyond the insecurities with the attitude that I am going to make something happen because I am me, The Dancing Writer, and I never give up. Giving up is not how I got to where I am today.

In other news, don’t forget the double book giveaway I am doing on my blog! You must be following me and you must comment on the blog post to be entered. You can find the post here.